As I sat at my keyboard this beautiful Sunday morning and thought about my own sense of loss-- that my church no longer feels loving, tolerant or even inviting; that many of my friends are now absent on Sunday morning; that our family has been considering withdrawing our membership and looking elsewhere for a spiritual home--I was very pleased to read the Ombudsman's Report. I believe that it gives a fair summary of my family's alienation from the church and some hope that we can reignite the caring, loving spirit that once dwelled here. I applaud Rosalie Clavez and Michael Berger for posting the report on the church list. I applaud Carole Crotty, Terry Finegan and Lana Kaminski for their willingness to listen and their courage to make specific recommendations to address the perceived loss of spiritual community that many of us feel.
In my opinion, the newsletter has become a dry listing of scheduled activities without the energy that a polylogue among members can promote. The forum structure--addressing dead air-- reeks of fear and an authoritarian need to control speech. The church list became silent after the congregation voted to pursue the rental contract on Building 2. I can only hope that members who feel alienated will return and resume efforts that began last summer with an open sharing of thoughts and feelings on the list. The mean-spiritedness that has emerged from time to time must be stopped. Every woman and man should have the right to express themselves here without fear of ridicule or shame. If we cannot love each other, how can we pursue social justice in the outside world?
This is the second church that we have attended that fell under the spell of Lyle Schaller's "corporate church". I don't think our member realize that Schaller is not a UU, he is writing for and about mainstream Protestant churches. I believe that we have the creative energy and will to create a church structure that honors our covenant. The very title of "corporate church" has its roots in the paternalistic, authoritarian instituions of the past. With our expanding knowledge of human interaction, the large number of professionals in our midst who study and develop interpersonal systems and models, we must begin to resolve the issues at hand. If everyone takes their hurt feelings and anger and leaves this church, what hope do we have for creating a loving, ethical community beyond our own walls? I suspect that some "secret-keepers" will revile those who brought this information to the list. Many of us believe that "our secrets are as sick as our family"(Bradshaw?). I hope everyone who reads these messages will understand that this is the healthiest possible route for our congregation to travel. Feelings swept aside will only fester, it is through open, sometimes painful, communication that we grow.
Sent with love and respect, Nan Johnson