Subject: [Birds] Commentary
Sent: Sunday, April 17, 2005 11:07 PM
From: Alex Machina
To: "Birds of a Feather"
'Freedom. Reason. Tolerance. If you want a trinity, consider this one: freedom, reason, tolerance'
A portion of the speech given today at UUCF by one of its former ministers on the occasion of UUCF's 50th year.
===
After the service, I spoke with Martin Conway, the current president of UUCF. I asked him how he in particular and the Board in general reconciles the words it hears from the pulpit (which receive standing ovations) with its continued policy of moderated chat lists.
Martin replied that he sees no contradiction between the Board's policy of moderating the list and espousing sentiments such as quoted above. He thinks that electronic communication can be nasty, does not convey precise meaning (due to the lack of face- to-face contact, body language, tone, etc.) and noted that he encourages the expression of all opinion in forums where people are present to talk with each other.
It is clear to me that neither he nor Susan Blasko (the former president, who was also present during my conversation with Martin) have any intention of changing the policy. They noted that they listened to Tony's presentation (and Karl's before that) and were not convinced that opening the UUCF chat list was wise because of the past harm it has caused in UUCF.
I continue to wonder what exactly it is that the leadership of this particular church is so afraid of that it would rather moderate its list rather than remain consistent with its stated principles of letting everyone have their say. (We criticize and laugh at the Politburo when it presents a single candidate for election in the former USSR - how does our 'democratic process' differ from theirs?).
I understand the objections. Email can be a terrible way to communicate and can lead to expressions of intolerance and harsh words. I've been tempted, on this list, because I have the power, to exclude certain writers - but have been dissuaded by calmer and more reasoned voices (thank you, Mike). Still, I think this list is much more interesting and loquacious than anything that is happening at UUCF Chat.
I find history a powerful influence. Since 'the troubles' at UUCF, I have not been able to feel that I can comfortably rejoin the flock. I find the dissonance between the words and the actions too wide. I like the words that UU and UUCF proclaim. I disagree with their net result and implementation.
I did not discover UU until my 40s. A close friend from high school, who was UU his entire life, left the UU movement in the early 90s, about the time I began exploring UU, with the words 'UU is a spiritual vacuum'. Those words still echo for me. Maybe it is too much to expect any institution to be true to its rhetoric. Maybe the best that can be hoped for is the creation of relationships with individuals and small groups, which are honed over time and shared experience. The formalization of any idea seems to pretty much kill it due to the discrepancies between its words and deeds. Christianity as a whole is another example. I see precious little consistency between the words of Jesus and the implementation of those principles by its followers.
So I suppose that it is best that I remain a 'friend' of the movement, not a member. I don't do membership well.
Finally, returning to the 'spiritual vacuum' comment of my high school friend: While I like the informality of UU churches, it's beginning to feel to me that the cacophony and monotony of the services does little to enhance the kind of spirituality that I'm yearning for as I get older. I think I sensed it as well this morning, when Rev. Nugent had to forcefully proclaim 'good morning' to quiet the throngs from their incessant chatter. The silence and ritual of the Catholic church is almost inviting to me as time goes on. I'm tiring of the monotony as well. The only thing that seems remotely spiritual to me is the music, the sermons and the occasional guest speaker. The rest is little more than recycled formula, always the same. I don't think UU does its words justice. (Not that I'm about to escape to traditional Christianity... but still... ).
Subject: Re: [Birds] Commentary
Sent: Monday, April 18, 2005 9:07 AM
From: Billye Stevens
To: [Birds of a Feather]
Cc: Mary Binderman
Dear Alex,
When attending UUCF or Reston services or any social get together, much depends on what spirit I carry when I show up. I may leave home devoid of spirit and return home the same way. Not very often. If I see someone I know or meet some one with whom I connect, if only that one time, I feel glad that I went. The service Rev. Norm gave last week was full of meaning and spirituality for me, and thus far I am glad I returned to UUCF. The people at UUCR whom I have met in services and my Covenant Group there mean a great deal to me as well.
Hang in there, Alex. Life itself can jade me. Occasionally there are what I call "gems of grace", then back to the same ole same ole. As far as I believe, this is the one and only life I will have.
Love to both you and Donna, and all you Eklektiks,
billye
[Commentary, by Alex Machina, 17 Apr 2005 is quoted in full here.]
Subject: Re: [Birds] Commentary
Sent: Monday, April 18, 2005 10:23 AM
From: Alisa Joaquin
To: [Birds of a Feather]
Alex,
I quite understand how you feel. I've been ragged upon from this chat as to whether I should be a member of a UU Church by others. I have chosen not to be a member of an institution where it does not always follow its own principles. Though the Sterling members are more open in their policies, and they do try very hard to follow those principles, but I still stay my hand when it comes to signing that book. They do have a discussion group that is not moderated. Even so, I feel that my own spirituality does not depend on me being a member of an instituion, and Gary's pledge covers all of us.
Spirituality does and should not be connected to an institution. Spirituality should be such that you can take your faith anywhere in the world and follow it. Jesus was not a member of an institution. He was a hebrew and he was thrown out of his home town temple because of what he preached. He preached radical ideas, ideas that the hebrew faith was not ready to accept. They looked for fulfillment of prophecy, but they looked for it in a blaze of glory outside of themselves. And when it came to them humbly, they did not recognize it for what it was.
Please do not be discouraged if some people will complain to you about "rejoining" or "resigning that book" to recommit your faith. The book is nothing. It contains no wisdom that you can take away with you. Only a list of fellow congregants, some old friends, some of them potential new ones. The wisdom that you find is in yourself. It has always been there. A seeker learns this throughout his "travels." They are journeys of the soul. No one can fully walk them with you. They may come and go for a short time, teaching lessons without realizing sometimes. Each important event is like a trial. We must learn from those trials. Some of them will be humrous, some will be challenging, and some will be very painful. All will help us grow in wisdom.
Remember, you do have a friend who has chosen herself not to sign the book. I respect you for it. It is your choice to make, and no one else can tell you otherwise.
(@
Alisa
Subject: Re: [Birds] Commentary
Sent: Monday, April 18, 2005 3:50 PM
From: [Marcia Helme]
To: [Birds of a Feather]
Hi, Alex,
I read your commentary with understanding and sadness. I have been an active UU for about 35 years now.
My parents were UUs, but that was UU in a different time. The service was more traditional. Although some of the beliefs were not. My mother said she liked a minister who brought up new ideas on which she could reflect while ironing. Apparently in one sermon, the then minister of the Springfield MA U Church preached a pretty atheistic sermon. The message was that he was tired of people who almost died in some terrible event but prayed to God and were spared death. They attributed being spared to the fact that they had prayed. But who says the people who did not survive prayed equally hard and were equally fine people?
Anyway, in the past 15-20 years I have seen a wave of change overtake the UU movement. Or, perhaps it is because I've changed cities a few times, so I have experienced several different congregations. The church I'm attending now has lovely people, but the minister bores me.
How many times have you tried the River Road Church in Bethesda? I think you would find Scott Alexander not boring, if he is still the minister there. I would love to see the media interview him on a regular basis instead of Pat Robertson.
Hugs,
Marcia H