The phrase "men's spirituality" is a dangerous phrase. It is a phrase that may give pause to many of us. For one thing, I've heard many a disparaging remark regarding the word spirituality, and not from just a few Unitarian Universalists. So to open our topic for this morning, I want to provide a more precise meaning for the word and hopefully eliminate some of the trepidation that might accompany the concept of men's spirituality. I discovered that the etymology around the word spirit is somewhat lengthy, but in summary the thought of an "animating or vital principle in man and animals" is the sense that I'm interested in here. The encyclopedia goes on to point out that we begin to find an interesting distinction between "soul" and "spirit" typical of Christian literature from the 13th or 14th century For me, these two words are related; I understand one in terms of the other. Soul and spirit together form a complete reality. Soul is everything we are individually, in the present and historically. Our body and mind, our knowledge and attitudes, our emotions and dreams, these are all parts of the soul. My soul carries with it a sense of I-am-ness; that I exist with a unique identity. It is my whole person and the sum of my travels through this life.
Soul is as practical as spirit is impractical. You see, I have a suspicion that there could very well be more to my life than my experiences and dreams. Maybe there is a real and tangible purpose for my being here. Maybe I do have a destiny writ in the language of the universe. The fact is, I simply don't know. Some things are mysterious for me, hidden so as to defy naming them. And this is, for me, the spiritual aspect of life. Spirit represents all those things that are unnamable. Spirituality is the word I use for all the parts of my life that I can not yet connect to my soul. My spirit is about my magic, my charisma; it is in Judeo-Christian terms my breath of life. And, as naming a thing often will do, the indescribable parts of my life have come to possess reality of their own, a certain palpability. It is my way of saying; maybe, my life is more than the sum of its parts.
Now this is a confession of sorts; I am using the words soul and spirit to describe for you what my reality means to me. I am telling you that while on one hand I can be pragmatic, on the other I am willing to allow for a part of life I know not, and indeed can not know for the present. I have learned that some things I formerly thought of as spiritual matters turned out to be a part of the soul's realm. I even admit it is conceivable that some day in the future, there may be no place at all for spirituality in human affairs. But I'm getting away from my point. What is important is that I can allow myself to be mystified, to stand in awe for a moment and merely pay attention. Humility; it is the demeanor that brings my soul into the presence of the spiritual. Humility and spirit are terms that go together in the same way as soul and self-esteem. All are relevant and all are significant.
This observation brings me back to men's spirituality. You can probably surmise from my definition of spirit that men's spirituality, in my view, is not about prayer, incantations, or super-natural invocations. I also hope my discussion about what I mean by spirituality removes some of the danger from the concept. Men's spirituality is about men learning to do something that our culture's expectation for masculinity has rendered, well, shameful. It's about the humble admission that men can be inadequate, both as individuals and as a population. It is easy to concur with that sentence, but it is a profoundly difficult act to commit.
In these terms, men's spirituality is about letting our guard down, first privately, then in the midst of fellow men, and finally on the public stage. It is about courage, the hero's journey, a saga of brokenness and renewal. And men's spirituality is about connecting with other men at an intuitive level, for reassurance and support during the journey
You know, maybe when it comes right down to it, I'm really just talking about a rite of passage in the Campbellian sense. We are all aware that our culture has come to worship youth. In so doing might we have let the door to adulthood slide shut? Men's spirituality is as much about rediscovering and opening that door, as it is about cultural adaptation. For indeed, we men must get ready to accept changes. We no longer live in a world with well defined roles where the man is the bread winner and the woman's place is in the home. It just isn't so any more. And it will certainly be less so in the future.
This morning, let us ask and hopefully begin to answer the questions: Is there a place for manliness in today's world, in the community, in our congregation or family? Can we men find ways to express tenderness, love, and humility without undermining the sense of pride? Is there a place for some rite of passage in today's techno society and if so what would it look like? I believe there are answers to these kinds of questions though they may not be simple ones. Moreover, I suspect that though these questions must ultimately be answered by men, they are also undoubtedly being answered by women.
In summary, I would issue a challenge to the men of this congregation. Embrace your spirituality! The weight of superfluous traditions will certainly crumble the patriarchal throne inherited from our forefathers. But do not fear the future, rather embrace your spirituality. I once heard a Baptist minister liken the spirit to sun light. When your back is to the sun, you can see your shadow spread out before you; it represents your soul and all the places where the light can not go Then he would admonish his congregation to turn, face the light, and receive the warmth of the sun, the spirit. But, he would go on to warn, when you do this, you can no longer see your shadow for it is behind you.